Ponderings

Ponderings

I hadn’t planned on writing about Mental Illness again for a while but I’ve been having a bad couple of weeks and it got me thinking…what if I’ll never be rid of this? People live with conditions that can’t be cured, only managed, all the...

Fast Food, A Cautionary Tale

  “Fast food will be the death of you” Proclaimed the salad eater. She put another cardie on, And huddled by the heater. “Just think of the cholesterol, The fat, and all that salt. You’re sure to have a heart attack, And it’ll be...
40 by 40

40 by 40

For those of you that don’t know, I’m 38. Time is running out before I hit the big 40 and there’s quite a bit I’d like to do before I hit that milestone.  A little while ago I put together a list of things I’d like to do before I...
Agitation

Agitation

One of the tell-tale signs that I’m heading for an anxiety attack is an intense feeling of agitation.  Everything is heightened and everything is irritating. Sounds are amplified to an unbearable level.  People breathing, chewing, speaking. Children crying, all...
Now, Not Later

Now, Not Later

When someone dies, there is always the inevitiable outpouring of grief and wonderful things are said about the person who has passed away.  This is beautiful and heartfelt and painful and cathartic but also, I think, a missed opportuntiy to say these things to a...
Suzanne

Suzanne

My lungs feel as if they are full of sand and my heart is heavy today but I’ve come outside regardless. I’ve come to spend some time in nature, alone with my thoughts, a note book and a pen because life is fleeting and tomorrow is never promised. A few...
Everything Changes

Everything Changes

I hate change, or at least I’m not very good at it.  I’ve never liked it and have always found it unsettling.  Whether it was starting at a new school, a new job, a new relationship there would be the anxiety, the tears and the sure and certain knowledge...
Blip

Blip

I stopped writing and I think that’s where it all went wrong. Everything got too big. It built up and up and had nowhere to go and I began to implode. Often when I need to write most I find it hardest to do. I start worrying that what comes out wont be good...